“A champion is not defined by their wins but by how they can recover when they fall.”

–Serena Williams

Hey Wanderers!

I had a weird conversation with one of my loved ones yesterday. Long story short, I felt weird after. I didn’t get what I felt I needed from the conversation. I ended up feeling robbed in the end.

Huh? What happened?

That’s when I realized this morning that I needed validation. I was looking for her to tell me that I was doing the right thing: to get out of a relationship I wasn’t happy in. Also, to tell me “Good job. You are so strong for leaving a job that caused you crippling anxiety.”

^^^^^^^^^^^^Guess what I didn’t get from that conversation. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

It is a fact of life that we are all doing the best we can. She didn’t know what I wanted or needed to hear. But, I did. So, why don’t I validate myself?

Truth is: I recently broke up with my boyfriend, quit my job, and have been experiencing some mental and physical health issues. In simple words “ Yeah, I’m fucking scared.”

I have been noticing that I have been leaning too much on friends and family to make me happy at this time of my life. Telling them the sob story that I believe about myself. The fact that I’m in too much pain to work, too anxious to continue school, too broken to keep my head up above water.

I don’t feel you have to believe every day that you are going to punch the world in the face. It’s okay to have sad days too. Anything society says about that not being okay is bull shit.

Sometimes, get your head above water just enough that your nose skims the surface. It is just a simple neck move (looking up) to be able to breathe.

Now, here are a few things I have been thinking about on how to validate yourself:

1. Are you happy? If so, that’s great. If not, only you know how to make yourself happy.
2. Is something inside you alive that wasn’t before? You probably are on the right path.
3. What is something you have done that you are so fucking proud of? Realize that you fucking did that. No one else.
4. Do you think you are enough? Of course, you are! You are a badass!
5. Journal about it. If you are at peace with your decisions in life, why are you looking elsewhere?
6. Are you saying “should”? If so, please drop that shit from your vocab. “Should” to me is the ultimate self-hatred word. Telling yourself, “I should go to the gym.” “I should do this.” “I should do that.” How does this thinking help you? Blah. In my past therapy groups, we weren’t allowed to say “should.” Dump it and see how you feel after.
7. Are you taking the time to recognize how you feel and why? Tell yourself it is okay. It is okay to be mad, angry, depressed, sad, scared, etc. Emotions are there for a reason. Listen to them. Love yourself for having them.
8. Finally, realize that you have everything you need inside of you. No need to go outward, see what is inside you and communicate with that. You got this. Look up and trust the process.

Hope this helps! Namaste!

“We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.”

― Maya Angelou

Hey Wanderers!

Thank you so much for dropping in to check out what’s new!

I think it’s time to share what this blog is about. This blog is about healing. Like everyone else in this life, I have struggled with my mental health, relationships, and trauma.

I feel this blog is a way to process everything and share my struggle. If I can help one person, I’d be content.

I wish for this place to be safe, happy, encouraging, filled with love for everyone who needs it. I would love for us to engage with each other and support one another.

I am in no way a professional, just a young “adult” (I use that term loosely because I still like coloring and eating cookies for dinner) figuring out life by living it. I feel we all need support in life and it is a part of human nature to lean on each other.

I have some stuff planned including an insight into my past, more healing music, and some guided meditation. Please let me know what else you would like me to talk about.

No bullshit; no making ourselves look better. We are here to show and discuss our real shit. For real people.

We are survivors. Don’t let anyone take that from you. Thank you for staying tuned!

Namaste!

Hello Wanderers! I’ve been searching some uplifting tunes for this time in my life. Here are some of my favorites right now:

1. “Battle Scars” by Lupe Fiasco
2. “Praying” by Kesha
3. “Learn to Let Go” by Kesha
4. “Scars to your Beautiful” by Alessia Cara
5. “Easier Said” by Alessia Cara
6. “I Have questions” by Camila Cabello
7. “Breathin’” by Ariana Grande
8. “Save Myself” by Ed Sheeran
9. “W.A.Y.S.” by Jhene Aiko
10. “Spotless Mind” by Jhene Aiko
11. “Beautiful Ruin” by Jhene Aiko
12. “Gypsy” by Russ
13. “Do it Myself” by Russ
14. “Brave” by Sarah Bareilles
15. “The Show Goes on” by Lupe Fiasco
16. “Alive” by Sia
17. “Guts Over Fear” by Sia and Eminem
18. “Lucid Dreaming” by Tinashe
19. “You Don’t Know Me” by Tinashe
20. “Thunder” by Imagine Dragons
21. “Sorry, Not Sorry” by Demi Lovato

What are your go- to songs that give you a pep in your step?

Namaste!